Narcissistic Abuse Dynamics
This post is about Narcissistic Abuse Dynamics. For a narcissistic person, they use their charms to create Flying monkeys. They attach minions to do their dirty work. This creates an emotional toll. The dynamics emotional abuse effect many people when they become leaders. Thus, the whole population suffers from their gaslighting and emotional abuse. Gaslighting is a form of abuse to exert power or control over others with the goal of manipulating them. Those experiencing gaslighting may often feel confused about their version of reality, therefore many experience anxiety, or be unable to trust themselves. Over time this translates into learned helplessness.
We will restate some definitions to clarify the tools used:
Flying Monkeys Defined:
In psychology, the metaphor captures something essential: flying monkeys are the agents through whom a narcissistic person extends their reach, exerts their control, and insulates themselves from accountability.
In practice, flying monkeys are enablers who act on behalf of narcissists. They are typically friends, family members, or colleagues who serve as surrogates, emissaries, and enforcers within the narcissist’s social network. Whether they act from ignorance or intention, their function is the same; they make it possible for narcissists to carry out campaigns of abuse by proxy.
Minions Defined:
A minion servile appears dependent, a follower, or underling of an abuser. Minion comes from Middle French and is related to filet mignon. Consequently, two terms connect with the word mignon, meaning “darling” in French. The earliest uses of minion refer to someone who is a particular favorite of a sovereign or other important personage. However, now the word minion developed a more derogatory sense referring to a person who is servile and unimportant.
How are Minions Flying Monkeys Created?
People rationalize the flying monkey/minion roles for a variety of reasons. Understanding their motivations, can be considered essential to understand the behavior. However to understand how narcissists successfully recruit agents and how those agents might be helped to see what they are participating in.
- Necessity — They feel beholden to the narcissist because of a family tie, a financial dependency, or a professional relationship they cannot easily exit.
- Acceptance — They crave the narcissist’s attention and validation. Joining in the narcissist’s inner circle provides them with a sense of status and belonging.
- Avarice — They benefit materially from enabling the narcissist. Their loyalty is, in essence, transactional. Do Billionaires ring a bell?
- Schadenfreude — Some individuals genuinely enjoy the spectacle of another person’s suffering. For them, participating in the narcissist’s campaign provides a sense of power and entertainment.
- Manipulation — Perhaps most commonly, they are empathic, well intentioned people with poor personal boundaries who have been deceived. They believe they are helping. They do not know that the story they have been told is a fiction.
Flying monkey behavior is often symptomatic of childhood trauma and codependency. The propensity to enable toxic dynamics is not born from nowhere. Particularly, research finds the causes rooted in early relational wounds. In these relationships significantly appeasement appears along with loyalty at any cost. Similarly alignment with the narcissist’s power feels like survival strategies.
Now we come to the point of this post how do you protect Yourself!
Emotional confusion appears to be the base of a dark personality person’s agenda. Lost of our own judgment becomes key in their emotional attack plans. Understanding, the authoritarian playbook and education are key coping skills. Becoming fact based is critical. Learning to evaluate facts and data, while not easy with mass media being controlled specifically, becomes critical. Facts you can check. The cost of food, gas becomes data points. Analysis of easy to obtained facts becomes a coping skill. Thus, we can fight the evening news that says nothing is happening with prices or the inflation is just 1% a month, when we see the food costs have jumped 20% in one month.
The Psychology of coping skills
Many podcasters talk about critical thinking. Surprisingly, they never define what critical thinking is. Therefore here is the definition.
Critical thinking is the process of analyzing available facts, evidence, and observations to reach sound conclusions or informed choices. It involves recognizing underlying assumptions, providing justifications for ideas and actions, evaluating these justifications through comparisons with varying perspectives, and assessing their rationality and potential consequences.
Gee, sounds like science research thinking. Real critical thinking takes time and effort. A podcaster uses gaslighting to gloss over the real facts and present an opinion as a fact.
So gathering facts is a critical coping skill.
Next, on the coping skill list concerns dealing with negative emotions. The number one negative emotion that we have to deal with is ANGER. Anger deceives us. It makes you feel powerful due to the Adrenalin rush, however you did not really change anything. In psychology we call this motive inconstant. The Adrenalin rush over rides frontal brain logic, subsequently putting your brain in a fight or flight mode.
Learning to use Emotional Intelligence
Lastly, to fight anger and misinformation, develop emotional awareness as a coping skill. Education helps you fight the emotional abuse and find a safe space. Resist!
Hope
Hope this helps, stay out of anger, gather verifiable facts, drop listen to opinion sources of information. Don’t listen to dark leaders and their flying monkeys and minions. Get help to deal with your emotional trauma. Mental and emotional health, help you see clearly.